What is IFS?

IFS is a model of the mind and a therapeutic modality for healing.

The IFS model says that the mind is multiple, rather than one – that we have different “parts” of ourselves with different needs, desires, patterns, personalities, and gifts. We can learn to make contact with these parts, have conversations to learn about them and help them heal.

There are several different kinds of parts, including:

• Exiles: hurt parts of ourselves that carry wounds and traumas from the past, and are isolated from our everyday internal life for their protection

• Protectors / Managers: parts of us that are invested in isolating and protecting the exiles in different ways that have worked for us in the past, preventing the exiles from being activated or triggered

• Firefighters: parts that protect us when the exiles are activated, usually by engaging in addictive or self-destructive patterns of different kinds

That may sound scary, but underneath each of these parts is something the IFS model calls Self, which is who we really are: the part of us that observes each of the parts, and if we let it, can lead the parts. When we establish a relationship between our Selves and our parts, we heal those parts and come into harmony with ourselves.

The Benefits

Regularly practicing and becoming skilled in IFS has helped me tremendously over the last couple of months. For starters, it has helped tremendously with my meditation practice – when I am able to resolve emotional issues and mental thought patterns, it’s a lot easier to concentrate! I had found this in the past with other therapeutic modalities, but IFS gave me another way to access a feeling of psychological safety and settledness.

On top of that, it’s also given me a lot of clarity about different issues in my personal life – why certain kinds of situations or decisions have been challenging for me, and what I need to do to resolve those issues. I’ve become more aware of different aspects of myself and more creative about how to meet many or all of the needs that these different parts have. Above all, I have the confidence that I can resolve emotionally challenging issues on my own now, without necessarily needing the help of my therapist to get perspective. While I still benefit from working with my therapist I’m grateful to be cultivating these skills so I can use them on my own.

Above all, while meditation is a wonderful skillset, novel psychological methods seem to be an important complement to more traditional contemplative practices, especially for modern Westerners and contemporary life. IFS has given me a new approach to augment my practice and overall well-being.